I really am scared to death.
My husband was home for two days and tomorrow he goes back to work and I am scared of being alone with her. I'm scared something will happen to her and I wont know what to do.
Its like all this time- I'm scared over one thing or another. At first it wasn't being able to get pregnant, than scared that the ivf wouldn't work. Once I was pregnant, scared that it wouldn't last- then scared that my babies would be born too early. Once they were born early- scared that something might happen to them.. scared to death actually.
I'm so green at this- I don't know what all the little grunt mean. Maybe shes in pain, maybe she'll stop breathing. And soleil isn't even home yet!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What do I do when there are two of them- how will I rest? As it is I am attached to the sound monitor listening and dissecting every little sound. I know this is normal.. I just wish I had more confidence. I do hope it comes with time.
Friday, December 14, 2007
scared
Posted by Gemini Girl at 11:23 PM
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9 comments:
It will come with time. If you've gotten this far, you'll be fine and it will be a lot easier when they are both home. Really. I think what you are feeling is completely normal.
Maya, remember - no-one else on the whole planet is better qualified to look after those two beautiful little babies than you are, for you are their mother.
You'll get to know all their little quirks in no time - newborns do make funny snuffly sounds though, but not for long.
My guess is, with twins, it's just wing it until you get a system or routine down pat. And you will!! They both look strong and healthy ... babies are sturdy little critters. xo
I know exactly how you feel. I does just take time. I was scared to death the first time I was home alone with them. But we all made it through. You will absolutely get used to what their noises mean. You will figure out how to make it work for all you. Like topcat said, you are their mom. No one can do it better than you.
Thinking of you.
Six weeks into this, with only ONE, and I still feel that way sometimes. But it does get easier. Don't feel bad for feeling ill-equipped or scared or even a little depressed. No one can prepare you for the reality of being responsible for a baby. Just take it one day at a time. Hell, one hour at a time. And it's okay to cry.
I am sure you'll get use to it.
The babies are gorgeous!
Best of luck in your major life transition!
:) This makes me smile....only because I remember this EXACT SAME FEELING !! I relied on J so much that HOW IN THE HELL can I POSSIBLY manage on my own.
You will be just fine. They are lucky to have you.
I have all the confidence in the world that you are going to be a great mother! You may not do everything "right", but no one can. Try not to worry about that so much. Just enjoy your girls!
It is okay to be scared...I still get scared to be home alone with my girls but it always turns out okay. And, yes, there are SOOO many sounds they will make that are okay but don't sound so okay. I am sure you did great and each time will get easier.
:)
Confidence is definitely something that comes with time. I already feel more confident about having a future baby, and I'm not even pregnant yet. It is very scary at the beginning, especially when you've never done it before...and there's no book or class that can really prepare you. You're doing great though! Keep up the good work!
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